I know everybody is asleep right now but I gotta say, I am dehydrated as BALLS. I woke up in the middle of my sleep because of how thirsty I was, and I had no bedside water. Like i am in desperate need of water right now, that any source of water will do. I am seriously considering going into the upstairs bathroom and cupping my hands and drinking the water from the faucet. That’s how thirsty I am. And the stupid part is, is that there is nothing stopping me from growing downstairs and getting a water bottle. Nothing. Not a single thing. The only reason I’m not going downstairs is because I’m too scared, and I don’t know why I’m scared. But Jesus Christ am I thirsty. Oh my god am I thirsty. This is like the one scene from the diary of a wimpy kid movie where rodrick was chasing Greg and he was gonna beat Greg up so Greg locked himself in his own room. Greg thought he was fine until he needed to pee. He needed to pee desperately, but he couldn’t because rodrick was standing right outside his door, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. Greg really needed to pee at this point because he saw the sprinkler outside and the aquarium water filter going. He finally made his attempt to pee, and actually peed, but then peed on rodrick instead. Yeah this situation is like that except Greg had the courage to get up and pee, where as I don’t have the courage to get up and go downstairs for some water. Man am I thirsty. Here I am. At 5:12 in the morning looking at my phone. Wanting to drink water. But I guess I’ll wait a couple more hours to go downstairs and drink some water. God even looking at the emojis whenever I type in the word water is getting me even thirstier. Anyways if you lasted this far and read till this far you are a real g and you understand my water crisis. Thank you for your time and I just wanted to let somebody know

Update on the thirst situation: the sun has risen only 13 minutes later. With time to think and time to reflect on my current predicament, I have realized I no longer need the water. I am an ascended being and I require no liquid substance to keep me going. My body is contempt and I am one with the universe. I don’t know what happened, but something just clicked inside and told me that I didn’t need water anymore. It might have been the settling of my mind, or the sight of seeing the sun rising up, illuminating the sky, turning the sky from a dark midnight black to a cold winters blue, through the edges of my black out curtains. To think of it, who needed water anyways? We humans value such worthless things, and water is no exception. We act like we need water to survive and live, when in actuality, it was just another want in life. Man, listening to myself talk is just inspiration in it of itself. A couple of minutes ago, I was dying of thirst. Begging for a single drop of anything. But now, here I am. Standing above all my problems, no longer depending on what I thought I needed most, that being water. You know earlier I compared the situation to a scene from diary of a wimpy kid, but now this situation is more like the plot to a basic teen love movie. The teen girl protagonist is chasing this hot teen guy around the whole movie, wanting to desperately be apart of his life. He constantly pushes away the girl until she has a glow up that changes her completely. She takes off her glasses, lets her hair down, and puts on some snazzy clothes. Now the guy she was chasing wants her, but the girl is naive no more. She knows he only wanted her because of her looks, and she pushed him away because of that. She became independent in the end, and stood her ground. This situation is like this because I am the teen girl. That is me. The teen boy I have been chasing around was the water. I finally realized that after time and time again of being pushed away by the water, I no longer needed the water. This situation can be used as an example that lets you know the one thing you thought you needed, wasn’t actually necessary at all, and giving it time will heal your wounds. I have come out a better man from this experience, and hope that everyone learned something from this. And also my god I’ve been typing this for 10 minutes I started typing this at 5:27 and now it’s 5:38.

Third and last update on the situation: I just got water and drink like 2 oz and I’m not thirsty. Turns out, I just needed to pee