My wife has recently brought up the fact that I almost never want to cuddle with her. Even after sex, we’ll go to sleep but not cuddling.

I think I’ve finally found the reason why I don’t want to cuddle. For years I’ve been getting my cuddles in at the gym. I’ve been noticing when I get the back and I’m going for the RNC, sometimes I’ll put my head on my opponents shoulder and take a deep breath in. My brain fills with oxytocin, the chemical my wife longs for. When someone’s in my guard and I hug them back down breaking their posture, I’m filled with endorphins. I come from a family that never really showed physical affection. But somehow I tricked myself into cuddling at the gym. Some of my opponents will lay on their side, and I’ll just move into the big spoon position and hold their neck till they fall asleep.

Do I need to quit BJJ to seek out my cuddling from my wife? Do I bring her to the gym and tell her that’s the only place she can get her cuddles?

TLDR: Wife wants cuddles, I get out all my cuddles in the gym.