Out of the kindness in my heart I decided to loan you my copies of Mario Party 8 & 9 for the Wii. You gave me 5 bucks and pinky promised you would return them in a month.

A month rolls by and still nothing. Everyday after school I got to you and say “Hey man, I really want to play some Mario Party and it would be great if you gave it back to me.” You stare back at me with a slight grin and say “Sure man, there ain’t a party like a Mario Party.” And with that I trusted you to bring back Mario Party 8 & 9.

A few months pass by and I really am starting to get sick of the constant air-headedness that you display when the topic of Mario Party is brought up. But somewhere deep down in your heart you finally remember to bring back Mario Party. I was filled with a sense of complete euphoria as I would be able to shake my wrist back and forth as Waluigi and conquer every single map. But there had to be a catch, and oh boy was that the case. You only brought back Mario Party 8. 8! Are you seriously kidding me! (Now all preferences aside, 8 is still quite the enjoyable masterpiece of Mario Party) How do you only bring back one of the two Wii games I lent you! I was furious but still managed to keep a poker face, I looked you dead in the eyes and said “Listen, you have delayed Waluigi time for long enough. If you don’t bring the party, I’ll make sure you have nothing to celebrate.”

But sadly my words fell upon deaf ears and Bryce never brought back Mario Party 9. After hearing “There ain’t a party like a Mario Party” for the 877th time I finally caved in and gave up reminding you. Even on the last day of school you muttered those same seven words.
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So Bryce, if you’re on this subreddit. Give me back my fucking Mario Party. You know how to contact me.