This can create a problem: If you’re constantly playing a little 5 on 1 before you hit the hay, you can inadvertently Pavlov yourself.

What do I mean by this? Well one day, when you actually do find yourself with a fine lass after a sock-hop, if you arrive at the station before she gets off, you’re gonna find yourself in a predicament when you start nodding off whilst 4 inches deep past the Mason Dixie line.

And boy lemme tell ya; if you think you’re gonna get another chance to fetch a pail of water with ol’ Jill again, she’s gonna tell you to go Jack yourself.

So think twice before you Napsturbate, friends.