Pooping. It’s quite an odd skill, however when I was young I could poop at an alarmingly unnatural rate, and not even that, I could put so much force into it that they were labeled as a doctor as “lethal”.

Growing up it was, well to say the least, very difficult. It wasn’t long before the other children discovered my “quark” shall we call it? I was never a part of any of the friend groups, even the other weird kids had exiled me.

By the time I reached middle school I had already cracked 15 toilets bowls. However I had learned to accept that it was just a feature I was going to have to live with. At this point the doctors still weren’t able give a solid reasoning as to why I was able to poop with such force.

And thus leads us to present day, I have learned to “deliver” the poop in such a way that it no longer cracks toilet bowls, you can still hear it hit the water with an unusual amount of force but I think I am well on my way to leading a normal life.