Don’t call my messenger unless you’re dying. Don’t send me ee cummings poetry (I hate it). Don’t send me a picture of your dick or your car (just your dog or your firearms maybe). Don’t repeatedly send me thumbs up emotes when I don’t answer (because what does that even mean?). Don’t send me a message demanding a selfie- there are a hundred pictures of me on my page go look yourself. Don’t tell me anyone else’s private business (I don’t care) or talk about what other people should be doing (I can barely keep track of what I’m doing never mind what anyone else should be doing). Don’t attempt to argue politics with me in private when you don’t have the guts to do it publicly. On a related note, don’t ask for my help if you piss off the radicals on my page because there’s nothing I can do to help you. Don’t invite me to your rally with the caveat that I be polite to white supremacists (I won’t be) and not engage in civil disobedience (because I will if I want to). Don’t use a lot of !!!!!!!!!!! in a row like that because it makes me jittery. Don’t gaslight me about Biden. Just don’t.