Fun squid penis fact: The squid’s penis is contained within its mantle, a hollow cavity with only one opening: The siphon. The siphon is a muscular organ which sucks in water and then shoots the water out along with anything else in mantle–which is how squids swim, as well as shit, as well as breathe, as well as shoot ink (squid anatomy is weird). For the penis to go through the siphon, it has to massively enlarge in both girth and length when erect, in some species becoming as long as the squid itself so that it may emerge through the siphon and enter the siphon of a female to ejaculate.

Imagine you didn’t have a dick and balls where you have them. You spread your asschecks to present your butthole to your partner. Then, a two foot long dick emerged through your butthole to penetrate your partner. That is how many squids have sex.

In most species, though, squid sex is way weirder. The penis is able to roll up all the sperm into a sticky glob, which the squid then grabs with one of its tentacles so that he can manually place it within the female. Once inside the female, this glob bursts open to fertilize her egg cells.

Imagine that you didn’t have a dick and balls where you have them. You spread your asschecks to show your butthole to your partner. You then shit out a worm-shaped glob of cum, picked up that glob, stuck your hand up your partner’s vagina, at which point the glob explodes. That is how most squids have sex.