Has anyone here tried eating poptarts cereal? I went down to the store and bought some, and as soon as I opened the box I didn’t think much of anything as I popped a tiny square into my mouth for the first time. Upon entering my mouth and going down my esophagus I suddenly felt a bit odd, something was definitely off. My penis suddenly erected itself to a massive 20 inches and I began to sweat profusely. My brain suddenly became flooded with vivid images of all the poptart propaganda that has aired since their release. Soon thereafter I began spewing strawberry filling out of my mouth while a fountain of sprinkles came out of my urethra. I couldn’t cry for help as my cries were flooded out by the massive poptart that began growing in my vocal cords. I suddenly saw a bright flash and it suddenly went silent. It was peaceful for a few moments as I realized the horror was over but then it hit me…I had become one of them, I had become a poptart wrapped in a foil bag ready to eat.

TLDR: Don’t buy pop tart cereal